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Author Topic: Interlude: Fireworks (part one)  (Read 74 times)
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bexeth
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« on: March 03, 2010, 11:17:17 am »

In this second interlude, we take a closer look at the events of July 4, 1966...the day that started it all.

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July 4, 1966; 12:15 p.m.

It was mere coincidence that brought Marnie to Hazel’s today. She was looking to try something different, and just get out of the office for a little while. The last thing she expected, or wanted, to see was Carol Mathison glaring daggers at her, from the moment she walked in. The hateful shrew appeared to be alone, and Marnie’s entrance into the dining area immediately captured her full attention.

Carol’s eyes burned, the contempt written all over her face, as she watched Marnie walk past. Even the most casual of observers could tell by just glancing over at her that she was dying to say something, but for once, Carol managed to keep her mouth shut. However, she did move to the other side of the booth, taking what Marnie surmised must’ve been Terri’s vacated seat, to watch her more intently as she awaited service.

Though it was somewhat of a tall order, Marnie silently (and repeatedly) stressed the importance of just ignoring her rabid audience. For a few minutes, she actually succeeded, deliberating over the menu, graciously greeting her waitress (a new member of the church) and trying her best to clear her mind. That moment was short lived, however, as she looked up to find Carol once again glowering at her. Marnie felt a deep blush come over her, and all of her inner resolve to just ignore it went right out the window. Before she could even take a moment to think about what she was doing, she’d marched over to Carol’s booth, intent on pleading Jeff’s case.

The conclusion of this interlude will be posted between chapters 20 and 21. Chapter 11 will be posted in two weeks. Thanks as always for reading, and have a good day!
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kellyzollo
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« Reply #1 on: March 07, 2010, 07:07:59 pm »

What a treat Bex, I read a few days ago but needed a break form my study session today and re-read.

Carol/Marnie- Carol was such a bitch, like really yet I still find myself oddly rooting for her and her smugness. I thought this was a brilliant interlude, to showcase things for how perceptive Carol was. I didn't expect Marnie to have feelings for Jeff, that was awkward can you say.

Brett/Lance- I don't know why that I keep seeing Brett being clueless to everything but the cloth. I still feel horrible for Lance, though I think he needs a bit of anger management issues for his outbursts.

Carol/Lance- So I am going to venture that there is way more here than meets the eye of the little glimpse you have given us. This also puts Lucas right back up there on my list of people who had to off Carol. I would think perhaps Carol was going to have him blackmail either Terri or Julia, which then puts suspicion back on Terri and Julia for the crime too.

Great interlude Bex, I love to see these flashback interludes to before the story began it adds so much to the current mystery on the series.

Can't wait for the next one.

Kelly
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bexeth
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« Reply #2 on: March 11, 2010, 12:34:22 pm »

Thank you, Kelly, for taking the time to leave me feedback! Smiley

This is going to echo a lot of what I already said in the Insights piece, but it's nice to see glimpses of Carol in these interludes and flashbacks. It's nice to piece together the kind of person she was and whom all she affected during her life. It also sheds some interesting light on suspects we might not have thought about before.

The scene with Carol & Lucas gets good in the 2nd part of this interlude, which I'm writing now. I'm all giddy excited over it, because it's really, really awesome, and I think it tells a lot about both of them.

As always, thank you so much for reading & sharing your thoughts!

And as an aside, guys, this week's "Insights" is up: http://bit.ly/9FIdKZ
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Dallas
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« Reply #3 on: March 11, 2010, 07:18:17 pm »

Well Bex, I have to hand it to you ... every episode seems to have a new twist. It's *so* much fun reading Carol. What a riot. I love her bitchy attitude. Her and Marnie were absolutely priceless at the restaurant. I love how Carol, and Terri for that matter, just not seem to care about what others think/care about them. Of course, because everyone has been so "Carol was so sweet" ect, it's so great to read that she is the opposite. I'm interested to read now as to why Marnie has never thought of Julia/Jeff being an item since Carol's death. Still, the back history is amazing.

The last scene has my interests peaked as well. What does Carol and Lucas have up their sleeves?

You certainly are making a habit of these intriguing Interludes. Well done my friend!
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bexeth
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« Reply #4 on: March 13, 2010, 12:26:48 pm »

Hey Dallas!

Carol gets the best lines of any dead girl I've ever written. But then, I haven't written that many...still, she gets some awesome lines. I loved when she called Marnie "Barbie." Poor Marnie. She handled it the best way she knew how...though it's unclear if her promise to tell Jeff about it had any bearing on that night yet.

As for Carol/Lucas, it gets better in the 2nd half of this interlude. I'm so excited about that scene, because when I was writing it, he totally shocked me by saying something I just never thought he'd say. It works so well for him though. I think the 2nd part of this interlude will be awesome.

Thank you for reading & for offering your feedback! Smiley
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